A Mother’s Wisdom Five Lessons

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“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” 

Proverbs 22:6

While my Mama taught me umpteen lessons in the 48 years we were together, I have chosen five to share with you today.

(1) Mama taught me to be brave.  Adopted at age 3 into a home with 3 big brothers, Mama had to learn to stop crying so Bud, Bob and Tom would stop all that teasing! IMG_2887 IMG_2891Upon hearing of her cancer diagnosis in 2006, she responded with two statements I will never forget: “Too Blessed To Be Stressed” and “Well, We’re supposed to Bloom Where We’re Planted, aren’t we?”  Only four months after her diagnosis, and near death, I asked her how long did she think she had. Mama responded with, “I don’t know-I guess that is the mystery of it all.”

(2) Mama taught me to have joy, to laugh whenever possible. This was important to my Mama-she truly believed that laughter was medicine for her soul as stated in Proverbs 17:22. In our den on Webster Drive, we used to fill at least 2 card tables with Canasta card games that lasted into the night.

Laughter word cloud concept

Whenever anyone complained about being tired, not wanting to play another hand,  she would say with laughter, “You can sleep when you’re dead!” She also loved to throw the dinner dishes in the sink and spontaneously dash off to a movie at North DeKalb Mall. Mama was all about having fun and seizing the moments.

(3) Mama taught me to serve others and to have compassion towards those in need. As a child, Mama attended a girls’ camp where a former missionary to Africa sparked her interest in becoming a medical missionary. After completing her R.N. training and marrying her true love, Johnny, they served several years in Central Africa, the Democratic Republic of Congo, previously called, Zaire.

IMG_2884IMG_2885However, it was not just mission work that Mama did, it was a bucket full of little things: holding the door for someone, taking cookies to a neighbor or cakes to the Veterans at the nearby V.A. Hospital, always having food in the frig for the many friends who camped out at Webster, and more. Mama’s example of service is one I hope to emulate for the rest of my days.

(4) Mama taught me to be a loving partner. It’s not always easy to express consistent kindness to the ones who we live with, and yet, Mama showed us how to do just that in the way she loved our Daddy. Believe it or not, Daddy came home for a quick-lunch every day and Mama always had something good ready for him to eat before he had to return to his afternoon appointments. She loved him with her whole heart.


IMG_2873Mama used to laugh and say, ” I met your Daddy before I met any of you six kids.”

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forever reminding us that he would come before any of us. EVERY Thursday, without fail, Mama would get her hair done and Daddy would take the afternoon off. The two of them would take in a movie, lunch out, anything to secure a date just for them. They celebrated their 58th wedding anniversary just days before Mama passed.

(5) Mama taught me to be present. Whether the news was exciting, good, or really bad, she would remind us to have “guarded optimism”. In other words, don’t get your hopes up too much and don’t lose hope, either. Do today, for today is really all we know and all we have. Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow.IMG_2886

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What are some of the lessons you have learned from the one who gave you birth?

 What lessons do you hope to instill in your children?

If this is the first or second Mother’s Day without your Mother, you might still have that physical aching in your heart. I want to share something I learned just 6 months after my Mama died at the age of 78. In April 2007, I was walking in the woods alone, still in deep grief, when it occurred to me that there were countless reasons I was blessed to have Polly Shivers Walker as my Mama.  Only five other humans in the entire world were fortunate enough to have HER as a Mother. From that point going forward, I made an intentional, conscious decision to focus on those reasons, with gratitude and it has continued to make all the difference in my life journey.

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My two brothers and my three sisters, and me (right front) in 1962. Many blessings have come from the union of Johnny and Polly Walker, including six children and their spouses, 25 grandchildren, and 9 great-grandchildren. (This includes grandchildren’s spouses)

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“And what does the Lord require of you?

To act justly and to love mercy and

to walk humbly with your God.”

Micah 6:8

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7 thoughts on “A Mother’s Wisdom”

  1. Joan, you are one amazing lady and I want to be like you when I grow up!!! I really mean that – you are such a special person with a special heart and I pray I learn from you. Your momma is smiling from heaven right now because you sound just like her. Love you sweet neighbor!

    Michelle

  2. HI Michelle, Thanks so much for reading and supporting my writing efforts. YOU are a dear and we love having you, Mark and the boys as our neighbors! Happy Mother’s Day to you! Love you, Joan

    1. They are getting a lot of praise from within the industry. I read somewhere a lot of actors and directors have praised the movie, the likes of Shyam Benegal. Some critics have praised it too. Even though most of it is hollow, i would prefer them speaking their mind, speaking the truth rather than being such ki*ass-*es about it. They should give SLB what he deserves and as bluntly as possible.

  3. HI Charlotte, WE six were blessed with a Mama who loved God and loved life. Thanks for your support and love, Charlotte! Happy Mother’s Day to you and yours!

  4. My momma was my Grandmother and my Father who raised 4 little girls with such Amazing Grace.
    Grandma bought us to Jesus and for that and her unfailing love I will always love with an open heart and a prayer on my lips.
    Your Mom sounds like she was so sweet , kind & a gentle soul.
    Thank you for sharing her with us.
    God Bless.
    Amanda Goodwill

  5. HI Amanda! Thanks so much for stopping by here and sharing part of your story with us…Yes, when raised with such love and devotion, loving with an open heart and a prayer on our lips can so easily become just a part of our makeup. Bless You!
    Joan

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